I’ve never been a gym rat. I’ve grown up in organized sports and swam competitively starting at 6 years young through college. The “gym” was never the place I sought solace or escaped away to, like so many of my peers. In fact, the gym has always represented a MUST or a HAVE TO.
The gym at my high school, regardless of endless amounts of athletic booster money, was a shit hole. Every morning before practice, I would always think, “This is the kind of place people get raped and murdered in.” Needless to say, I never really wanted to go hang out there.
All of that changed when I joined Equinox. This place is the bee’s knees, the cat’s meow, the best thing since sliced bread…it’s fucking awesome.
Let’s do the stats:
- Complementary valet – Check
- Looks/feels like an elite hotel or country club – Check
- Smoking hot chicks with liberal attire requirements everywhere – Check
- Ample amounts of gay dudes* - Check
- 25 meter, salt water pool – Check
- Great towels** - Check
- Kiehl’s products and a full offering of shave needs in the men’s room – Check
- All the things chicks like (Yoga studio, spin classes, dance classes, etc.) – Check
Oh and yeah, they have nice equipment, too. Suffice it to say, this is one of those kinds of places you can truly ENJOY going to. The price tag is kind of like getting kicked in the nuts while watching someone bang your wife, but damn it, it’s worth it!
I’ve learned that shelling out this kind of dough, makes you show up to the gym. The best part though, it’s not a HAVE TO kind of place; it’s a “Thank God I have this opportunity” kind of place. For those of you that have the resolve to spend the cash and make it part of your life, there is no compare.
If you’re in Dallas, hit up the Highland Park location on Oak Lawn and tell Phil Smith that Team Hatchell sent you. He’ll take good care of you.
* Smoking hot chicks to gay dudes ratio easily 3:1 in favor of hot chicks.
**None of those bullshit, scratchy, almost see-through towels you get at “regular” gyms. The real deal, like you have at your house.